This coming weekend is the 10th anniversary of my graduation from school. I can't attend it for different reasons, but the invitation to the celebration made me think. About the past, the future. About change.
When I look back on the past 10 years and compare today's Vicky with the Vicky of that time, I see two very different women. I think I have changed a lot. The thought occured yesterday, when I came home all sweaty and dirty and happy (!) after a lap on the bike.
Ten years ago, I would never have voluntarily sat on a bike. To get somewhere, maybe. But to do sports? Never!
The Vicky from ten years ago liked to make up an excuse for sports lessons every now and then. She would never have tied her running shoes and hadn’t even discovered her love for the mountains. If I think about her now, I am sad about all the wonderful moments, I might have missed, because I wa so stuck in an habitual behavior.
10 years have changed me. I lost a few characteristics, but I also learned a lot. I have made new friends, lost old friends and some people have stayed with me and I stayed with them.
If I could tell the old Vicky something, I'd tell her, that she is going to become an awesome person. And that Future-Vicky is going to love herself a lot.
Today's Vicky is strong and self-confident. Most times, she knows what she wants. She has learned to feel comfortable in her body (almost always) and she speaks her mind. Loud and clear and often.
Today's Vicky has tried a lot and stands on her own two feet. She is independent. Sometimes she is vulnerable and occasionally, she bursts into tears for nothing. She takes time for herself when needed. She talks (that hasn't changed in nearly 30 years), but she can listen and - if necessary - shut up.
Most of the time I am proud of what she has achieved. I think I like the Vicky I am today.